'Quartet' is sweet and slooowww

BBC Films

 

Like the wheels on a wheelchair which go round and round, these are the days of their lives in a retirement community for musicians at a luxurious estate in Buckinghamshire, England. 

Has there been a more placid British film? 

Dustin Hoffman may not look 75 but his directorial debut affirms his age.  He must have had nursing homes in mind when he made Quartet since it’s ripe pickings for them.  And quite predictable.

Except for a few critical F-bombs, the movie is harmless, however, shorn of the dull parts and with more hilarious lines, the movie could have been lots better.  Give me those late night writers! And some action, please.  What?  We can’t stand to see old people kiss and make hoochee? Or sing?

Quartet is about as lively as Tom Courtenay and Maggie Smith in this scene/BBC Films 

 

Show stealers are certainly Pauline Collins and Billy Connolly.   Why would anyone like Maggie Smith’s character want to re-marry a grumpy old man like Tom Courtenay's character?  Had he hinted at a smile once, his face might have fallen off. Women are not that desperate, Mr. Hoffman. Please supply some humor occasionally, Grumpy Old Man.

Unless scenery (Mother Nature) is a new category, the movie will win no awards, but the musical score is grand (Dario Marianelli).

Had a travel agent been posted at the theater exit, she/he would have needed an assistant.  Two assistants.  I am ready to go!  (With a side trip to Leicester, please.)

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Hang around for the credits at the end to rock your wheelchair.

At E-Street last Friday night, the 7:15 p.m. feature was almost sold out (small theater) to those generally above age 50.  No surprise, however, the vast quantities of wine consumed by moviegoers and the clinking of discarded bottles upon the floor at the end were ear lifters.