It's hard to believe that any movie can be more boring than the lame 2014 cat movie the critics loved, moviegoers hated and which dived at the box office, but The Favourite wins hands down.
Speaking of hands, Favourite wins the award for "Most Hand Jobs" in cinema. I think it was during one of them that I dozed off for the sixth or seventh time, either then or during the 6,325 times the characters walked back and forth in the hallway which consumed about 45 minutes when all the marches are put together. (I searched for a photo of the march walk but, conveniently, the producers supplied none, probably because the actors made a culvert, and the set was destroyed.)
Speaking of, this has got to be the cheapest set in movie history since it varied none. But, of course, the de rigueur bare breasts were present, and we almost got to see a naked man except no one would want to see that naked man whose body could be mistaken for a giant wrinkled can, not worth throwing a tomato at (AKA "blood orange").
Also, the F-bomb and (new!) the C-bomb (write and ask) play dominant roles.
My former colleague, Ben, used to tell me that men love to watch lesbians go at it which explains why this yawning, fawning movie was nominated for Best Picture. You gotta be kidding. The only possible nominations should have come for costuming (Sandy Powell: Why were the gowns so dull and repetitive?) and Best Supporting Actress (but she was nominated for Best Actress) Olivia Colman who plays Queen Anne.
You will thank me for saving you from wasting time and money on this monstrosity which infuriates me that I did. What does it matter that part of it is based on history? It's still horrible.
Watch for movie takes on other films coming to this site, but none as bad as The Favourite (with British spelling included!).
patricialesli@gmail.com
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